I Won’t Accept Your Regrets

Chapter 18:



I need left this empire.

At first I thought of settling in the wilderness, and not leaving the empire altogether, but it seems that here too it will be difficult for me to avoid the glances of strangers.

Moreover, it was a divorce of the emperor and empress, and not of an ordinary noble family. Their interest in me won't go away so easily.

So it was safer to raise a child somewhere far away from here. Of course, this will be a test for me. But if the goal is to protect my child, I won’t stop.

I still don’t know what it’s like to be stuck somewhere far away, in foreign lands.

And in a situation like mine, it would be more convenient if Helen stood behind me. I'm already so used to her.

It will be better than looking for someone new.

Having made my decision, I spoke to my father:

"I decided to run, but there are many threats. Any help from the Duke will help."

“Of course, don’t worry. But how is your health? Since then, has there been any pain?”

"I’m fine."

"Let's wait a bit and call the doctor again."

"Okay, it would be nice to check the child before leaving."

"You should go fast, right?"

Sadness froze in my father's eyes. I just got home, and already started talking about leaving. So I didn't like it more than he did.

But we had to hurry. The longer I stay on the estate, the less I want to leave later.

"…Yes. I think it will be better. I wouldn't have to if His Majesty wasn’t so intrusive."

"Yes, you’re right."

The father sighed and said.

"I already thought of something about the child. I don't know if you remember, but your mother had a younger sister. You saw each other only once, when you were very young."

"I barely remember that."

A woman with the same hair as my mother. But the old memory had already faded, and I couldn’t even remember her face.

"Your aunt didn’t want to get married, so she often quarreled with her family and left to the Lund Kingdom long ago. She was completely erased from the count's family tree. Some time ago I received news of her death."

"Oh…"

"It's sad, yes. However, even the fact of her death wasn’t recorded anywhere, because she was discharged from the family. She is a good option for the legend of the unborn child," said father with bitterness in his voice.

If the person was removed from the family tree… It wouldn't be surprising if she was hiding the child somewhere.

And if we later enroll this child in the family, then a believable story will come out:

[The Duke took into the home of his sister-in-law's child, orphaned across the seas.]

Sounds simple and straightforward.

I thought about it for a while and looked at father.

"Please prepare everything properly."

"Good. Then I’ll find the nearest ship to the Lund Kingdom."

"Yes."

"No matter how fast it is, it will take two or three days. In the meantime, don't think about anything and rest."

My father left the room, giving it up for last. I sat up on the bed.

Lund Kingdom.

A place where my baby and I will get a new life?

I stroked my belly.

"Now let's live happily with your mom."

I went to bed without thinking, for the first time after a long time.

The sun over the estate gave way to darkness.

* * *

Raymond looked up at the starry sky and sighed.

"Ha."

"Your Majesty, the wind is cold at night. Would you like to return to the palace?"

The servant behind Raymond spoke anxiously, but Raymond's gaze caught a glow in the sky.

"…It was Ellie's favorite star."

"She likes the stars. Because they are always in the same place. They are permanent, she always said.”

"Sometimes, when I don’t know what to do and where to go, it seems that it will give me the answer.”

I don’t know when it was, but one day she told me that, pointing to the stars in the night sky.

Maybe because she left today, Ellie was popping up in my head all the time.

Where does this feeling of emptiness come from?

I cannot get this sensation out of my chest. The night winds make this void even colder.

Raymond lowered his head slowly, looking at that star.

Then he looked at the moon palace, the empress's palace. Its lights have already gone out.

This large palace was now a thorn in his eye, only because the owner was gone.

Soon Raymond exclaimed:

"What the hell am I doing here?!"

He couldn’t eat normally, the emptiness inside prevented him from sleeping, and the place where he now hobbled as if in a trance was the empress's palace.

Looks like he misses Ellie already.

"Ha. What an absurd."

Raymond smiled at this ridiculous idea.

‘I miss Ellie.’

Perhaps we were once friends who could share our experiences, but now we are farther apart than even when we were friends.

In this strange relationship, in which there was no love or friendship, he gradually pushed Ellie away.

Yes, he did it, but there is no point in regretting.

No… You don't have to miss her.

She's already gone.

Raymond turned his back on his own mind. He could not take his eyes off the empress's palace, which stood without a single fire.

At this time, the servant hurried up.

He relayed the message:

"Sire."

"What?"

"I just received a message from the temple confirming the divorce between His Majesty and Her Majesty."

A cool breeze shook his black hair. Raymond blinked slowly at the servant.

"Tomorrow I have to publicly announce the divorce."

"Your Majesty, would you like us to prepare the palace?"

Raymond glanced at the palace in front of him. He knew why the servant asked this.

After the divorce is officially announced tomorrow, the empress's seat will remain vacant.

If he puts Lisa in this place, Lisa and Edmund will move to the palace together.

Probably, not only this servant, but also numerous nobles suggest that the next empress will be Lisa.

Because she is the mother of his child.

Raymond remembered Lisa, who was in the palace today.

"I could not even think that you would go for a divorce. I'm sorry that I did that."

"This is not your fault. This problem is between me and the empress."

"On the way, I met Her Majesty when she was leaving the palace. She said … She wants you and me to be happy…"

Lisa said she was sorry, but Raymond couldn’t see any emotion in those green eyes looking strangely at him.

What a strange inconsistency…

Since that incident at the banquet, he experienced inexplicable discomfort with Lisa.

So he turned to Edmund without answering her words.

"I wished you happiness."

Suddenly, Lisa's existence disappeared from his memory, and only the words of Ellie that she said remained in his head.

Are you like other nobles? Do you think I'll make Lisa the empress?

Admittedly, that would be natural.

Be that as it may, the empress's palace shouldn’t be empty for long, and Lisa's child will have to be called a prince.

He knows that Lisa is becoming Empress and Edmund is the heir.

He knew all this, but… he didn’t want to allow it.

No, it’s not clear why, but his instincts rejected Lisa.

He felt as if something was missing nearby.

"Prepare the palace according to protocol. Tomorrow the divorce from the Empress will be announced, and in two days Edmund will become a prince. And… call to me a knight early in the morning."

"Yes, Your Majesty."

Saying this, Raymond looked once more at the Lunar Palace, and then turned to the Sun Palace.

* * *

The next morning, the Imperial Palace officially announced the Empress's divorce.

Upon hearing this news, Duke Croft looked more animated than depressed.

No one was upset about the news of the divorce, and I was able to calmly finish breakfast.

So, after breakfast, while reading a book in my room about Erund, the capital of the Lund Kingdom, I looked up at the knock on the door.

"Your… no, milady. The doctor has arrived."

Helen was still getting used to my new title. I smiled and said to come in.

When Helen opened the door, a doctor entered the room. I asked Helen to leave.

I was going to tell her about the pregnancy, but the appearance of the doctor was already a good clue for her.

"Yes Milady."

After that, I looked at the waiting doctor. When our gazes met, the doctor opened his mouth first.

"Milady, have you had any more pain after that incident at the Imperial Palace?"

"No."

"Let's see…"


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